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Are There Any Kinds Of Movies You Dislike? I Have My List

 

Paola_Bassanese_itcher_contributorAre there any kinds of movies you dislike? I know I do! Let’s start a conversation: what movies make you cringe or want to shout at the TV or cinema screen? I have a few bug bears, namely: Italian 70s comedies, cheap slapstick comedies and pretentious arty films. ~ Paola Bassanese

Italian 70s Comedies: Why I don’t Like Them

If you ask the average Italian person about Italian cinema, they are more likely to have watched and appreciated the Fantozzi film series rather than anything from Federico Fellini.

Why?

Italian comedy films like Fantozzi are pure escapism and their catchphrases have seeped into the Italian language and popular culture. I despair at the thought.

All I wanted to do was poke my eyes out with a hot rod for the entire film

There’s a whole bunch of Italian movies from the 70s and early 80s that should be burned.

No, wait, the 90s and 00s have some rotten ones too!

Yes, I am starting a witchcraft hunt against crap Italian films!

***

In a virtual bonfire I would put:

All Fantozzi movies

  • Fantozzi (White Collar Blues) (1975)
  • Fantozzi Subisce Ancora (1983)
  • Fantozzi va in Pensione (1988)
  • Il secondo tragico Fantozzi (1976)
  • Fantozzi Against the Wind (1980)
  • Fantozzi – Il Ritorno (1996)
  • Fantozzi alla Riscossa (1990)
  • Fantozzi 2000 – La Clonazione (1999)
  • Fantozzi in Paradiso (1993)

Early Diego Abatantuono

  • Movies like Attila flagello di Dio (1982)

All Ugo Tognazzi movies

  • Sissignore (1968)
  • Cattivi pensieri (1976)
  • I viaggiatori della sera (1979)

All Vacanze di Natale (Christmas Holidays)

Series by Carlo and Enzo Vanzina and featuring Christian de Sica (son of legendary film director Vittorio de Sica) and TV comedian Massimo Boldi

  • Vacanze di Natale (1983)
  • Vacanze di Natale ’90 (1990)
  • Vacanze di Natale ’91 (1991)
  • Vacanze di Natale ’95 (1995)
  • Vacanze di Natale 2000 (1999)
  • Merry Christmas (2001)
  • Natale sul Nilo (2002)
  • Natale in India (2003)
  • Christmas in Love (2004)
  • Natale a Miami (2005)
  • Natale a New York (2006)
  • Natale in Crociera (2007)
  • Natale a Rio (2008)
  • Natale a Beverly Hills (2009)
  • Natale in Sudafrica (2010)
  • Vacanze di Natale a Cortina (2011)
***

It is worth noting that the Christmas Holidays film series are defined as “cine-panettone” aka pre-packaged, over-sweetened, indigestion-inducing fluffy films to watch at Christmas.

But hey, if you want to put your brain in the freezer and keep it there for the duration of these films, be my guest!

If you want to put your brain in the freezer and keep it there for the duration of these films, be my guest!

I always felt that I lost valuable time watching any of these movies – and anyway I never watched them in their entirety, losing the will to live after approximately 5 minutes from the start.

I particularly despised Grandi Magazzini (1986) by Castellano & Pipolo with a “stellar” cast of popular comedic actors (Paolo Villaggio from Fantozzi, Christian de Sica and Massimo Boldi from Vacanze di Natale… can you see a pattern there?).

I remember going to the cinema with a friend to watch Grandi Magazzini because she was a fan of Villaggio and all I wanted to do was poke my eyes out with a hot rod for the entire film!

Cheap Slapstick Comedies: Why I don’t Like Them

Dumb and Dumber (1994) or Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls (1995) anyone?

Not for me thanks!

I prefer to watch Jim Carey in films like Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004).

And no, I will not watch anything like Leslie Nielsen‘s The Naked Gun (1988) or Airplane! (1980).

The films that I call “cheap slapstick” are the ones that are obviously put together in a hurry, with no attention to detail and with poor acting and script

To me the gold standard of slapstick comedy is Jerry Lewis, and there is absolutely no contest: he wins hands down.

The films that I call “cheap slapstick” are the ones that are obviously put together in a hurry, with no attention to detail and with poor acting and script.

Sometimes these films bank on the popularity of the lead actors, and sometimes they just have a lot of money invested in them so their producers do all they can to get a return on their money by over-publicising and hyping these comedies.

Pretentious “Arty-Farty” Films: Why I don’t Like Them

 

Don’t get me started on Tree of Life (2011).

I will never get those 138 minutes of my life back.

I literally wanted to throw any inanimate object within my reach against the telly

I literally wanted to throw any inanimate object within my reach against the telly. And not even Brad Pitt was enough to make me interested in the storyline.

The film was equally panned and praised by the critics, in a kind of “Marmite” response of either loving or loathing it.

***

It’s Good to Talk: Are there any Kinds of Movies You Dislike?

Over to you, peeps!

If there’s a movie you really dislike, don’t be shy and tell me why you don’t like it in the comments.

I am Paola Bassanese, and I love twitter – I think in slogans! I am a contributing author at itcher mag covering mainly quirky movies that I like and that I hope you′ll like too. [n-e-x-t] I have written a few books including The Foraging Home Cook, and also write about health and lifestyle for the Huffington Post. I consider myself to be a Londoner even though I was born in Italy. I love 80s music and foreign language films, but I also enjoy going to the opera and ballet.
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